Yesterday it took us 2 hours and 24 minutes to get home from we were driving home from C’s place of scholastic business [we live 50 miles apart]. It was the looongest drive home EVER in the sense of our booties being in one place for a lot longer than we had prepared them for. Stinkin’ rain.
Experts say long trips are when you have captive audience, so without further ado:
[Just coming in to traffic, about 14 miles from school, 36 miles from home]
C: I’m going to take a nap.
A: Me too. [ I shut my right eye and keep the left eye open and coast with traffic]
C: HEY! You can’t sleep and drive.
[I turn my face so she sees I have one eye open]
C: Oh, hah.
C: Chinese fire drill?
A: No, what if one of us slips and falls on the wet concrete and we cant drive to the house? Then all these people around us would have to wait on us.
C: I’ll drive.
A: You can’t drive, it’s raining.
C: I can’t drive because its raining?
A: Well you cant drive because your not old enough AND its raining.
C: What if I was super woman and I could drive? What if I lived right here in these apartments and one day I was walking down the street to the store and I saw something happen where a person needed to be taken to the hospital and it was raining, would you expect me to tell them I couldn’t help them because I cant drive in the rain, my stepmom said so? Wouldn’t it be the right thing to do to help them by taking them to the hospital in a car, even if it’s raining?
A: The right thing to do would be to call 911 and stay with them til they arrive.
C: But what if it was an emergency and they couldn’t wait and I was willing to take them?
A: You don’t have a car because you’re walking down the street going to the store. And if your superwoman, you could fly them there or scoop them up and run really fast there, you don’t need a car.
C: I’m not the kind of super woman you think. I have the sense to know the person is hurt, but I can’t fly and I’m not picking them up to run to the hospital.
A: Do you know where the hospital is over here?
C: Yes, it’s over there behind wal-mart.
A: Oh really?
C: Uh huh.
A: So, where would you get this car since you don’t have one?
C: My neighbor. He’s sitting in his apartment watching TV and eating chips, so I use his car.
A: You would steal your neighbors car?!
C: NO! I’m borrowing it for a good cause, he will understand. I am going to bring it back.
A: Ok, don’t steal cars. What if this person that is hurt is a faker? What if he is playing opossum and is praying on children?
C: Why would he fake being hurt? He’s laying in the road while it’s raining.
A: He could be, waiting for a nice person to pick him or her up and waiting for the right opportunity in the “borrowed” car to turn the tables and steal you. Then you’ll be off to a land never seen and we would miss you. Just call 911.
A: Stranger danger.
C: I see. But I’m super woman, they cant get me. I win.
A: You win?
C: Yea, super woman always wins, she’s super.
A: I see.
And that, my friend, is captive audience! Stranger danger and calling 911 without being boring. I love her creativity, I like to think I am part of it, I can be PRETTY random sometimes. Like our conversation ~9 miles from home:
C: What if everybody owned a horse?
A: We would all need big pockets.
C: What? The horses are too big for pockets. Maybe ponies.
A: Can you imagine if every person had a horse? We wouldn’t fit, they would need to be small. Like seahorses, but I guess in this case a sea-pony but not from the sea.
C: OK. [I wanted to say, I win, but that would have taken the fun out of it]
I hope you enjoyed the first installment of Conversations with C, I hope to have more this week since it is spring break and we are taking quite a few “captive audience” trips through out the week.
Oh, I’m thinking of making a TEEN YEARS WITH C book on her 13th birthday. She won’t necessarily know about it until she is 20ish. I need to find a ginormous journal to keep my thoughts, our activities and conversations in, something that will hold ~7 years worth of stuff. Any ideas where I can get my hand in this kind of gem?